Clean plate club

So Dad has this very elite, prestigious club that he's a part of (Mom's actually the VP), and I wanted to know how I could get it. It's called the "Clean Plate Club," or CPC for those of you that like acronyms.

It's pretty easy to join, I found out. All I had to do was get rid of all the food on my plate (or tray, rather). WHAT?! That's it?! Piece of cake...I've got this eating thing down to a science now.

So I told Mom I was up to the challenge one day at dinner. I can't remember what was on the menu, but I think it included prunes (don't ask) and some tomato chicken concoction.

Done and done.

Wait...what the...? It doesn't count if the food goes all over your face and not in your mouth!

That's crap. Someone should've been more clear about the rules for this stupid club.

I'm outta here - I'll be in my room pouting and passed out.